I am 18 years old. I graduated from high school early about two years ago. I've been working in retail for about a year. My job is 40 hours a week and I'm making $10 an hour. I've had a very hard time saving my money, because I wind up spending most of it on food. I also have to pay for my car payment, gas, my phone bill, and my gym membership. My mom has decided to start charging me $200 in rent every month. Originally, she said she would save it for me. And give it to me once I needed to make a first payment on an apartment. But now she is saying that she will deduct $50 per week if I don't have my room clean at all times and if I don't help her clean the house. I feel like this is completely unfair. If I'm paying for my room, i should be able to do what I want with it, right? Or am I overreacting? Is it fair what she is asking? I feel like it's unfair to me to have to pay the money and not get it back if I don't do chores. Please help. What should I do?
Okay, well $200 actually isn't bad for rent. In the real world, rent will be $600+. So here it is..your mom has decided to charge you rent. There is nothing you can do about it, it has happened. You either complain about it, or pick yourself up and organize your life and make it a learning experience so you can be a successful human being. Do you need a gym membership, or can you work out at home for free? It's important to keep your room clean, because when you have a place of your own, you will have to get used to cleaning it regularly. You might as well get used to this stuff now, because it's going to happen within a few years anyway.
Do you really need a gym membership or is there a cheaper option? Can you get another part-time job? What are your career goals? These are things you should start thinking about.
I always find it amusing when teens start facing the real world of paying for their keep. The rent is quite cheap and doubt you could find that deal anywhere else. You should be helpting around the house anyway with chores if you live there. It's her house, her rules. When me and my brothers turned 18, we had a choice of getting a job or going to school. If we got a job, it was expected of us to pay monthly to help out with the household finances. Very fair. It was also understood that we helped around the house too. We always had to do that soon as we became old enough to do things. I was cleanin up my room proabably since I was about 7 years old.
Sounds like your mom was tired of you having an income and contributing nothing to the household. I don't blame her and would have done the same. You may get stuck at home or have roommates the rest of your life unless you further your education and get a skill set of some kind that puts you on the road to real independence. A smart person might think about that. Doesn't really matter if its fair or not. Life is never fair and the sooner you realize that, the better off you will be in the long run. Accept it now.
Where do you live? Depending on where you live, 200 a month could be extremely reasonable. Assuming you are getting paid minimum wage, which is 10 dollars. That would likely place you somewhere in California or Massachussetts, by following the general population distribution curve, i would bet you are somewhere in California. I want to remind you that the average Angelino spends about half of their pay for rent. 40 hours a week times 4 weeks a month, times 10 dollars an hour is 1600 dollars a month before taxes. You spend roughly 1/8th of your pay on rent which is beyond reasonable. Now, your mom wants you to maintain a clean room because she believes that maintaining tidy room would make you a better human being. Sure, you have the freedom to live in an unkempt room, but should you? What is more beneficial to you? By the way, maintaining a clean room is obviously meant to benefit you and not your mom. God, millennials are so dense and weak these days.
We own 2 homes and rent out 1 of them. It's a 600 sqft home 2 bedrooms, kitchen, loving room, one bath, laundry in basement. We charge $500 a month for it. They also must keep it clean, no smoking inside, keep the yard up, and it'll late on rent there is a late fee charge. If they don't keep up the place then we can legally evict them and charge them for damages or any major clean up. We also would keep there deposit.
Your mom is asking what any tenant ask even what an apartment would ask to keep your living space clean.
Do you split the grocery bill or only cover yourself? Is a lot of it going out to eat?? That can add up QUICKLY and your gym membership how much is that? You could work out at home (YouTube some videos), jog around your neighborhood or park, buy some gear to work out at home. Or find a gym thats cheaper (planet fitness is only $10 a month I believe). Back off the new phones for a bit and stick with what you have.
Mom of a 19 year old here. 😊 you sound like a good kid on the right path. Listen it's not easy for your mom, but she is actually preparing you for the real world. ( except she's saving your rent money for you). You will likely NOT survive on $10/ HR out on your own.. Not w a car anyway. Sounds like as long as you keep your room clean theres no rent hike?And thats completly within your control. I know it's hard, and true life is not always fair. I would keep doing what your doing for as long as you can and maybe look for a second or better paying job, then maybe set a time when you want to move out. I was kicked out by my folks when I was 18 and pregnant (w my son who's now 19) and only a high school education. I made it by on $11 an hour at one point (never got child support) and now make $20 HR by sticking w my same job and proving myself long enough to get promoted. So i'm finally comfortable but it's HARD at first. But stay at home, trust me!
Quite honestly that sounds like a good deal to me. I just turned 18 as well and my parents started making me pay for everything on my own. I even pay them rent and they keep the money, they aren't saving it for my future. I also have to do chores every day or I will be kicked out. That's just how it works with life.
You are now an adult and you get to live with your mother in her home. If you were to go out and rent an apartment you would be paying way more. I think your mom is being really kind to you. It should be simple for you to keep a clean room and do your chores on time! You should be doing that anyways because you both live in the house and should contribute equally to it.
I know it's a harsh reality check. My parents forced me to grow up when I turned 18 and I was not expecting that. I was given the choice to either move out or pay rent like an adult. I was mad in the beginning, just like you probably are, but when you think about it your parents are just trying to help you be a successful adult. I think my parents deserve to be payed a portion of my monthly earnings because it wouldn't be fair if they had to work for our food and home and I just got to use my money for fun.
I wish you the best! Everything will be okay!
So you are making about $400 a week before deductions that is about $1300 or so a month and you are complaining about paying $200 a month in rent. YOU are an adult now and if you were adult enough to graduate at 16 from high school why didn't you go to college on scholarships and grants? It also means that YOUR mother is no longer obligated to help you at all. She has obviously tried but you have proven you are wasting money and not sticking to a budget. You are also expecting her to pay for your rent, utilities and food out of HER pocket. Asking you to pay that much and help her clean the place is nothing. Don't like it then MOVE out.
If she's charging rent, you should be able to keep your room how you want. Landlords don't check on whether your room is clean. Granted that is pretty cheap rent. I don't think parents should charge rent if they see their children trying to transition into adulthood and being responsible. This can go beyond age 18. You are also old enough to be responsible for finances and saving for a deposit..She doesn't sound like she's actually going to give you the money though when the time comes...
I'm 21, go to school full time, and work full time. I've had a job since I was 18 making less than you (started at 8.50 an hour currently at 9.75 an hour). I've been paying $200 in rent since I was 18. I also give money for my phone as well as car insurance. It's life. I'm much happier giving money to the house than I am being thrown out before I'm ready. If you have a hard time saving money, do what I do and give a parent your debit card. Set up a weekly allowance for yourself that way. It sounds childish but you'd be amazed at how much it helps you. I enjoy sacrificing a little financial freedom for both my future and for when something comes up that I want to do. Fact of the matter is, you have to grow up sometime. No, it's not easy, the world is a scary place to a teen who has no clue how it works but you need to learn, adapt, and accept it.
I know of a few people who charge their kids rent once they turned 18, or charged them once they finished college (if they went to college). They said their parents told them that if they paid their rent, even though its the parents house, they can do whatever they want because they paying rent and you cant tell someone who is paying rent how to live their life because its just like if you were to rent an apartment and the landlord tries to tell you where to work, how many hours you should be working, how long you can be unemployed for, that you cant bring over dates to spend the night, cant have sex in apartment, they can search through your phone anytime even though you're paying for it, cant go clubbing, cant go to bars, cant buy alcohol, etc. They said thats not how life works, so their parents wanted to show them how life works.
They also said that if they decided to not pay rent, thats when parents can make those arbitrary rules because they living in the house for free.
Now that I am older, I realized they were right. When they told me I was 18 at the time, and of course, didnt have experience with this situation so I just believed what they told me. Now that I am 24 thats why I said "now that Im older I realized they were right." I realized they were right. So thats why I think you should just move out and live on your own. Get a roommate if you have to. You paying rent and she still controlling you. That makes no sense. Besides that, thats not real life.
I don't know what motivates your mother, but I know that women think emotionally. That means how they feel, influences how they think and act.
The fact that you now are getting independent and having your own money, she wants some control over you. So think about it. Will you let her control you, or do you want to be out of her grip?
Its cheap living versus renting or buying a house.
If you have a gf or wife, it will be much worse.
Childhood is over. And your entitlement days are over. There are two repeating subjects that will plague you from now on. Money and power (control). These two things will be what you struggle about. So overcome it as soon as possible.
And forget about what's "fair". Life in general is unfair.
I would have been taking $50 a week from your first check and onward. It would have been put in an account for your future, such as a house or something else big.
Do you want some advice? Stop spending so much money on food. Ask your mom how. She can tell you.
The simple solution is to move out and find a place to live with utilities and a land lord who doesn't mind how your place looks, but only charges $200. a month.
Since it is Mom's house, she wants it kept presentable. You are an adult and are free to disagree and to live elsewhere.
Anyone who graduated two years early could have earned a certificate in some two year community college course or an AA/AS to continue on to a four year degree. Higher income has a positive correlation to training/education.
You seem happy working for low wages and having plenty of free time. If that is your decision, you need to decide if you are moving or staying where you are.
Stop crying. Chores...are you 12? These are necessary activities (unless you are a pig) She does not want a pig, so out you go,
. Real life is when you pay 900 mth for the room without utilities. That is extra on top. Elec, telephone,water AND you pay for your car, food, car insurance, car tires, car repair, wash clothing as machines charge a buck a load, toiletries, car gas, and you have to do all the chores without pay. Year end taxes on your income will have to come off.
Miss a rent payment for any reason and find yourself on the street homeless. No "If's or maybe's"
That is Life.
And you want to complain now? When she can toss your butt out onto the street because you are whimpering?
Evaluate your situation again.
It CAN BE A WHOLE LOT WORSE. You decide.
You may be 18 but you are very niave. When renting any type of accommodation, regular inspections are involved. Real estates also have tenancy agreements just like the rules your mother has outlined and if you fail to meet them, your bond is surrendered and you're evicted from the premises. So welcome to the real world love! I bet you turn your bedroom light on, recharge your phone, run your ipad or laptop, watch tv.... electricity costs alot of money. And that's just the start! Laundry detergents and water to wash your work uniforms cost money. If you dont own your own bed and bedding, you're paying to rent those things in your room too! They don't come for free in the real world either honey! Plates you eat off, cups you drink out of, that's what your rent contributes to. All the things you seem to think come for free at home. I was 11 when I got my first job and my mother started charging me rent!!! And I'm grateful she did!!
IF you were smart you would not have gone into debt to buy a car. That is money down the toilet. I drive a 10 year old Civic I paid $500 for (cash, no payment) and my insurance is half as expensive because I don't need full coverage like you do. Plus it gets almost 40 mpg so my gas bill is cheaper, too. Your mom is correct to make you chip in for rent. Food bill is only high if you eat out often. Learn to cook and eat for half as much.
Okay, well $200 actually isn't bad for rent. In the real world, rent will be $600+. So here it is..your mom has decided to charge you rent. There is nothing you can do about it, it has happened. You either complain about it, or pick yourself up and organize your life and make it a learning experience so you can be a successful human being. Do you need a gym membership, or can you work out at home for free? It's important to keep your room clean, because when you have a place of your own, you will have to get used to cleaning it regularly. You might as well get used to this stuff now, because it's going to happen within a few years anyway.
Do you really need a gym membership or is there a cheaper option? Can you get another part-time job? What are your career goals? These are things you should start thinking about.
I always find it amusing when teens start facing the real world of paying for their keep. The rent is quite cheap and doubt you could find that deal anywhere else. You should be helpting around the house anyway with chores if you live there. It's her house, her rules. When me and my brothers turned 18, we had a choice of getting a job or going to school. If we got a job, it was expected of us to pay monthly to help out with the household finances. Very fair. It was also understood that we helped around the house too. We always had to do that soon as we became old enough to do things. I was cleanin up my room proabably since I was about 7 years old.
Sounds like your mom was tired of you having an income and contributing nothing to the household. I don't blame her and would have done the same. You may get stuck at home or have roommates the rest of your life unless you further your education and get a skill set of some kind that puts you on the road to real independence. A smart person might think about that. Doesn't really matter if its fair or not. Life is never fair and the sooner you realize that, the better off you will be in the long run. Accept it now.
Where do you live? Depending on where you live, 200 a month could be extremely reasonable. Assuming you are getting paid minimum wage, which is 10 dollars. That would likely place you somewhere in California or Massachussetts, by following the general population distribution curve, i would bet you are somewhere in California. I want to remind you that the average Angelino spends about half of their pay for rent. 40 hours a week times 4 weeks a month, times 10 dollars an hour is 1600 dollars a month before taxes. You spend roughly 1/8th of your pay on rent which is beyond reasonable. Now, your mom wants you to maintain a clean room because she believes that maintaining tidy room would make you a better human being. Sure, you have the freedom to live in an unkempt room, but should you? What is more beneficial to you? By the way, maintaining a clean room is obviously meant to benefit you and not your mom. God, millennials are so dense and weak these days.
We own 2 homes and rent out 1 of them. It's a 600 sqft home 2 bedrooms, kitchen, loving room, one bath, laundry in basement. We charge $500 a month for it. They also must keep it clean, no smoking inside, keep the yard up, and it'll late on rent there is a late fee charge. If they don't keep up the place then we can legally evict them and charge them for damages or any major clean up. We also would keep there deposit.
Your mom is asking what any tenant ask even what an apartment would ask to keep your living space clean.
Do you split the grocery bill or only cover yourself? Is a lot of it going out to eat?? That can add up QUICKLY and your gym membership how much is that? You could work out at home (YouTube some videos), jog around your neighborhood or park, buy some gear to work out at home. Or find a gym thats cheaper (planet fitness is only $10 a month I believe). Back off the new phones for a bit and stick with what you have.
Mom of a 19 year old here. 😊 you sound like a good kid on the right path. Listen it's not easy for your mom, but she is actually preparing you for the real world. ( except she's saving your rent money for you). You will likely NOT survive on $10/ HR out on your own.. Not w a car anyway. Sounds like as long as you keep your room clean theres no rent hike?And thats completly within your control. I know it's hard, and true life is not always fair. I would keep doing what your doing for as long as you can and maybe look for a second or better paying job, then maybe set a time when you want to move out. I was kicked out by my folks when I was 18 and pregnant (w my son who's now 19) and only a high school education. I made it by on $11 an hour at one point (never got child support) and now make $20 HR by sticking w my same job and proving myself long enough to get promoted. So i'm finally comfortable but it's HARD at first. But stay at home, trust me!
Quite honestly that sounds like a good deal to me. I just turned 18 as well and my parents started making me pay for everything on my own. I even pay them rent and they keep the money, they aren't saving it for my future. I also have to do chores every day or I will be kicked out. That's just how it works with life.
You are now an adult and you get to live with your mother in her home. If you were to go out and rent an apartment you would be paying way more. I think your mom is being really kind to you. It should be simple for you to keep a clean room and do your chores on time! You should be doing that anyways because you both live in the house and should contribute equally to it.
I know it's a harsh reality check. My parents forced me to grow up when I turned 18 and I was not expecting that. I was given the choice to either move out or pay rent like an adult. I was mad in the beginning, just like you probably are, but when you think about it your parents are just trying to help you be a successful adult. I think my parents deserve to be payed a portion of my monthly earnings because it wouldn't be fair if they had to work for our food and home and I just got to use my money for fun.
I wish you the best! Everything will be okay!
So you are making about $400 a week before deductions that is about $1300 or so a month and you are complaining about paying $200 a month in rent. YOU are an adult now and if you were adult enough to graduate at 16 from high school why didn't you go to college on scholarships and grants? It also means that YOUR mother is no longer obligated to help you at all. She has obviously tried but you have proven you are wasting money and not sticking to a budget. You are also expecting her to pay for your rent, utilities and food out of HER pocket. Asking you to pay that much and help her clean the place is nothing. Don't like it then MOVE out.
If she's charging rent, you should be able to keep your room how you want. Landlords don't check on whether your room is clean. Granted that is pretty cheap rent. I don't think parents should charge rent if they see their children trying to transition into adulthood and being responsible. This can go beyond age 18. You are also old enough to be responsible for finances and saving for a deposit..She doesn't sound like she's actually going to give you the money though when the time comes...
I'm 21, go to school full time, and work full time. I've had a job since I was 18 making less than you (started at 8.50 an hour currently at 9.75 an hour). I've been paying $200 in rent since I was 18. I also give money for my phone as well as car insurance. It's life. I'm much happier giving money to the house than I am being thrown out before I'm ready. If you have a hard time saving money, do what I do and give a parent your debit card. Set up a weekly allowance for yourself that way. It sounds childish but you'd be amazed at how much it helps you. I enjoy sacrificing a little financial freedom for both my future and for when something comes up that I want to do. Fact of the matter is, you have to grow up sometime. No, it's not easy, the world is a scary place to a teen who has no clue how it works but you need to learn, adapt, and accept it.
I know of a few people who charge their kids rent once they turned 18, or charged them once they finished college (if they went to college). They said their parents told them that if they paid their rent, even though its the parents house, they can do whatever they want because they paying rent and you cant tell someone who is paying rent how to live their life because its just like if you were to rent an apartment and the landlord tries to tell you where to work, how many hours you should be working, how long you can be unemployed for, that you cant bring over dates to spend the night, cant have sex in apartment, they can search through your phone anytime even though you're paying for it, cant go clubbing, cant go to bars, cant buy alcohol, etc. They said thats not how life works, so their parents wanted to show them how life works.
They also said that if they decided to not pay rent, thats when parents can make those arbitrary rules because they living in the house for free.
Now that I am older, I realized they were right. When they told me I was 18 at the time, and of course, didnt have experience with this situation so I just believed what they told me. Now that I am 24 thats why I said "now that Im older I realized they were right." I realized they were right. So thats why I think you should just move out and live on your own. Get a roommate if you have to. You paying rent and she still controlling you. That makes no sense. Besides that, thats not real life.
I don't know what motivates your mother, but I know that women think emotionally. That means how they feel, influences how they think and act.
The fact that you now are getting independent and having your own money, she wants some control over you. So think about it. Will you let her control you, or do you want to be out of her grip?
Its cheap living versus renting or buying a house.
If you have a gf or wife, it will be much worse.
Childhood is over. And your entitlement days are over. There are two repeating subjects that will plague you from now on. Money and power (control). These two things will be what you struggle about. So overcome it as soon as possible.
And forget about what's "fair". Life in general is unfair.
I would have been taking $50 a week from your first check and onward. It would have been put in an account for your future, such as a house or something else big.
Do you want some advice? Stop spending so much money on food. Ask your mom how. She can tell you.
The simple solution is to move out and find a place to live with utilities and a land lord who doesn't mind how your place looks, but only charges $200. a month.
Since it is Mom's house, she wants it kept presentable. You are an adult and are free to disagree and to live elsewhere.
Anyone who graduated two years early could have earned a certificate in some two year community college course or an AA/AS to continue on to a four year degree. Higher income has a positive correlation to training/education.
You seem happy working for low wages and having plenty of free time. If that is your decision, you need to decide if you are moving or staying where you are.
Stop crying. Chores...are you 12? These are necessary activities (unless you are a pig) She does not want a pig, so out you go,
. Real life is when you pay 900 mth for the room without utilities. That is extra on top. Elec, telephone,water AND you pay for your car, food, car insurance, car tires, car repair, wash clothing as machines charge a buck a load, toiletries, car gas, and you have to do all the chores without pay. Year end taxes on your income will have to come off.
Miss a rent payment for any reason and find yourself on the street homeless. No "If's or maybe's"
That is Life.
And you want to complain now? When she can toss your butt out onto the street because you are whimpering?
Evaluate your situation again.
It CAN BE A WHOLE LOT WORSE. You decide.
You may be 18 but you are very niave. When renting any type of accommodation, regular inspections are involved. Real estates also have tenancy agreements just like the rules your mother has outlined and if you fail to meet them, your bond is surrendered and you're evicted from the premises. So welcome to the real world love! I bet you turn your bedroom light on, recharge your phone, run your ipad or laptop, watch tv.... electricity costs alot of money. And that's just the start! Laundry detergents and water to wash your work uniforms cost money. If you dont own your own bed and bedding, you're paying to rent those things in your room too! They don't come for free in the real world either honey! Plates you eat off, cups you drink out of, that's what your rent contributes to. All the things you seem to think come for free at home. I was 11 when I got my first job and my mother started charging me rent!!! And I'm grateful she did!!
IF you were smart you would not have gone into debt to buy a car. That is money down the toilet. I drive a 10 year old Civic I paid $500 for (cash, no payment) and my insurance is half as expensive because I don't need full coverage like you do. Plus it gets almost 40 mpg so my gas bill is cheaper, too. Your mom is correct to make you chip in for rent. Food bill is only high if you eat out often. Learn to cook and eat for half as much.